8.3

Funnily enough, the same night that I was having a difficult time listening was the same night that I chose to have selective attention. This party that I went to this last weekend was a party my friend Jessica’s sister, Victoria, was having. I went because several of my friends were going to see Jessica. Most of the party was made up of Victoria’s friends, who are quite a bit younger than most of us. I was at the bar (yes, they have a bar in their house. If I could own a house, it would be theirs) making myself a drink when one of Victoria’s friends came up (let’s call him Joe) and started talking to me. He was obviously drunk, more so than he should have been. I was making my drink and he was telling me some inane story about something that he thought made him cool. I honestly wasn’t paying attention to him, except for when his friend (we’ll call him Moe) came up and was obviously making fun of him. Joe would tell one bit of his story, and Moe would call him out on it, obviously not believing him. At this point I started to pay attention to what Joe was saying, but only for the fact I wanted to hear what Moe had to say about it. Selective hearing at it’s best.

Week 8.2

The most interesting concept that I found this week was the idea of external and internal noise. Think about this: you’ve got a midterm coming up, and you sit down, all prepared to study hard. Then your roommate comes home with this “crazy story that you just have to hear!” So you spend 10 minutes listening to her spout off her story, then you decide to get back to studying. But! your window is open and you hear music coming from someone’s radio. So you shut your window, and hope to get to it. But then! you realize that the water dripping from the sink is driving you crazy, so you go an tighten the handle to make it stop. You can finally start now that all the external distractions are done, right?
Wrong. You sit down, look at the clock, and realize you have 14 hours and 37 minutes until your exam. Then the internal noise begins: will I do alright?; I wonder what the questions are going to be; what percent of my grade is this?; ugh I can’t wait for spring break; I’m hungry;, so on and so forth.
Internal and external noise affects us in pretty much everything that we do. It’s learning to overcome these obstacles so that you can communicate better in any situation that we as a society should probably spend more time on.

Week 8.1

At work we have meetings before we open or when we close and are about to go home. Now let me toot my own horn here; people at work tend to listen to what I have to say because I’ve been at my job for so long. I know the ins and outs better than almost anyone; when I give advice or constructive criticism it’s usually for a reason, not just to try to make myself look good. However, a couple nights ago, at our closing meeting, I just could not pay attention to what was going on. It was 10:50 at night, there was a party that I was supposed to go to after work with some friends who I hadn’t seen in a long time, and I wanted to get out of there. My manager and other coworkers were talking, and I absolutely was not listening. I had too much internal noise going on: “should I run home and change? Do I need to bring anything? Does my hair look okay? They’re talking forever, why can’t we just GO!?”
In reality I’m not sure what could have helped me avoid this. There are times that you just think things are more important. In reality, a lot of our closing meetings are the same: what sales were, if anything important happened, any funny stories of the night. I suppose I could have tried to switch shifts with someone, but then again, that’s the easy way out.

Week 6.3

Proxemics – how we use the personal space that surrounds us. This mean how we react to what affects our space, or our personal “bubble”. In my group, we’re very friendly, and it isn’t uncommon for people to be touching at all times. Not at all in a sexual way, but just in a comforting way. However, this is probably different than other groups and cultures. For example, it might be considered shameful for people in an Islamic culture to be as close as my group of friends are.

Chronemics – this is the study of how we use our time. The book states that time is money in our culture, and boy, is that true. I know that I value my time like you would not believe; being a full time student and a full time worker, I don’t have a choice but to know that each moment where I DON’T have to be studying or at work is precious. I know I tend to rush around a lot and stress. However, if you were to look at chronemics in say, Italy, it would be different. Over there it’s not about how much we can get done in a single day. Things are taken at a slower pace, way more relaxed. I wish my life was more like that.

Week 6.2

The most interesting concept that I found in the textbook for this week's chapter was, well, since I can't say the whole chapter since because I find nonverbal communication in general to be interesting, was paralanguage. Paralanguage is "the meaning that is perceived along with the words used to deliver in a message. It is 'how' we say something." This interests me because so many things can be taken from how someone says something. You can say "Oh, that's great." but if your tone reflects different, that you know that you don't ACTUALLY mean something is great.

Within the part about Paralanguage I enjoyed the part about accents. Now I don't know about you, but there's nothing sexier than an accent (well, certain accents at least). I could listen to someone with a British accent read the dictionary to me, and I would be entranced just because it sounds different than what I'm normally hearing in my every day life.

Week 6.1

One or Both Parties Can Assign Meaning

“Nonverbal communication becomes meaningful when one or more parties assign meaning to it.” This means that once more than one group or party realize that a nonverbal action can be rather significant, it can be applied to a group’s problem. For example, a group member might always be on time to group meetings. However, that member was late one week. Then the next, then the next. If no one says something to this person, then they are just going to continue being late until the group says “hey, we need you to be on time.”

Things We Notice Lead To Meaning

"The things we notice, or our perceptions of nonverbal cues, lead to meaning" This means that whatever catches our attention does so for a reason. For example, someone in your group is yawning while you're talking. This can mean that the person is either just really tired, or they're bored with the situation. In either case, the nonverbal cues that were just sent aren't one of a positive nature, and can lead to group dissatisfaction.